LAUGHTER
“There are moments which mark your life. Moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same and time is divided into two parts-before this and after this” -Fallen-
The Bible tells us in Proverbs 17:22, “A merry heart does good, like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones.” We have been so over loaded with this coronavirus. The other day, after watching the world news, I just sat and cried at so much sadness and death. It can lead us to be so sad, so depressed, full of hopelessness and fear of the future. I feel that we need some laughs in the middle of the sadness. For 36 years, I led women in a ladies day every two years. So many good memories from them! So many women who I hope I was able to remind them that they are special to God, a daughter of the King; giving them hope in the middle of their fears and hope for the future. It was a day to get away from their everyday challenges and come together as sisters to sing, share with each other, time for themselves and a time to laugh. I have since stopped leading these retreats. I decided that I needed to go a different route with the rest of my life here on earth. Since then, I have published another book and started this blog. I am so thankful that you take time out of your lives to give me encouragement and hopefully glean from each blog.
I have gone through some of my folders from those ladies events. I thought it was time to forget, even if for a little bit, what is going on around us right now. So, I am sharing a few of the jokes we laughed at during those events. Yes, I know there are some of you ladies who helped me with the events, that are rolling your eyes and thinking oh no! Here are a few that I hope can “tickle your funny bone.”
FUNNIES
There was a great loss today in the entertainment world. The man who wrote “Hokey Pokey” died. What is really horrible is that they had trouble keeping the body in the casket. They would try to put his right leg in and, well, you know the rest.
Some of the artist from the 60’s are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate us aging baby boomers. Herman Hermits “Mrs. Brown you’ve got a Lovely Walker” Bee Gees “How can you Mend a Broken Hip” Bobby Darin “Splish, Splash, I was Havin’ a Flash” Roberta Flack “The First Time ever I Forgot your Face”
My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.
George and I were in a lively conversation when he stopped talking and retrieved his white, no frills hanky out of his back pocket. Unfolding it, he vigorously blew his nose. I continued to talk not skipping a beat. After a few good snorts, he folded the hanky right on the creases, again and again, until it was returned to its perfect square. He put it into his right hand and slid it down into his back pocket. When he looked up at me, I had become mute. My mouth was agape. I couldn’t believe what I had just seen. ‘Is something wrong?’ George said. ‘Do you always fold your hanky like that after you blow your nose?’ ‘Yes. Why?’ ‘So, I’m sorry to tell you that when I’ve been doing laundry and find your hanky so neatly folded in your back pocket, I assume it hasn’t been used and I simply put it back in your drawer without washing it.’ It was George’s turn to stand there with his mouth open. He said, ‘No wonder I always have so much trouble getting my glasses clean!’
A man and his ever-nagging wife went on a vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, you can have her shipped home for $5000 or you can bury her here in the holy land for $150. The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home. The undertaker asked ‘Why would spend $5000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would only spend $150?’ The man replied, ‘Long ago a man died here and was buried here and three days later He rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance!’
Three old sisters, 92, 94 and 96 years old, respectively, all lived together. One day the oldest drew a bath. She put one foot in the water, paused, then called downstairs to her sisters, ‘Am I getting in the tub or out of the tub?’ The middle sister started up the stairs to help, then paused and called back downstairs, ‘Was I going up or coming down?’ The youngest sister who was sitting at the kitchen table having tea said ‘I guess I’ll have to help. I hope I never get that forgetful’ and knocked on the wooden table. She got up then, paused, and called, ‘I’ll come up as soon as I see who’s at the door!’
I have an age spot here on my hand! I am getting so old that whenever I eat out, they ask me for money up front!
After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and then washed her hair in the sink and smeared her face with a slick green moisturizing cream that hardened into a mask. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience evaporated. At last she threw a towel around her dripping hair and stormed into their room, threatening all sorts of dire punishments if they didn’t get back into bed and go to sleep! As she left the room, she heard one small voice whisper in the darkness “Who was that!”
Adam blamed Eve, Eve blamed the snake and the snake didn’t have a leg to stand on.
The best vitamin for a Christian is B1.
I hope these funnies got your thoughts away from all the sadness associated with this silent-invisible coronavirus. As my mother always said, ‘This too will pass!’ Let’s hold onto that hope for the future. Even though it already seems like months and months since this started, before long this will all be over and we can get back to our ‘normal’ day to day activities. We can all get back together and give actual hugs, not virtual ones! Let’s remember that God is helping us day to day. When God leads you to the edge of the cliff. Trust Him fully and let go. Only 1 of 2 things will happen, either He’ll catch you when you fall or He’ll teach you how to fly!
I will share with you a memory from Ladies Day 2012. This is a quote written by my granddaughter, Alexis, who was about 18 at the time.
“Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place. In the end, we only regret the chance we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have and the decisions we waited too long to make.” -Alexis-
My prayers are with you my friends! May you stay safe and sane. If you did not get the chance to read my last post, read “Maybe it is Time.” You might check it out. Since we have a bit more time on our hands, maybe it is time to think about some things!
I will close with a writing from Lupytha Herman which I think applies to us today.
“One day she finally grasped that unexpected things were always going to happen in life.
And with that she realized the only control she had was how she choose to handle them.
So, she made the decision to survive using courage-humor and grace.
She was the queen of her own life and the choice was hers.
Make the choice today to see the beauty in each day. Stop and just breath. Do what you can to brighten another’s day. Remember that God is by your side no matter what you are going through right now. It is a scary time, but have faith and trust in God, that brighter days are ahead. Because, yes, this too will pass!
(The picture at the beginning of this blog, was taken on October 26th, 2019. This day was the 10th anniversary of my husband’s death. Such a hard day! The little ones are my daughter’s babies. The little one, Iley’s, laughter on the bottom step, is so special! The oldest, Adasen, who is on the top step, said, “she is laughing at something grandpa said from heaven.” Wow, isn’t it a blessing how these little ones think and how God can send us ways to make us smile even on hard days?)
Be safe! Stay home! You are protecting yourself and others! God will see you through!
Till next time! Keela